not where i wanna be

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honesty. i am not thrilled with where my life is right now. After leaving my freshman year at Charleston, I’m back in the good ole O. Sadly I get the back home blues really frequently, which is a good thing when I think about where I chose to go to school. I start my summer job this weekend and I gotta say i’m not as excited as I should be. I declared hospitality as my major and working at a country club does fit that category but it’s just not satisfying me. Being a freshman half way across the country from home, I learned that the world is literally your oyster. You can pick up and move and do whatever the hell you want. I am not right now doing whatever the hell I want. I’m back where I was a year ago and im mentally slipping into the same space. After all my mental battles and climbs this past year, slipping back into old habits isn’t something I would be proud of.

Not sure what the point of my writing this is, but it’s mostly just to let myself vent. I want to be over seas studying abroad, getting real world experience instead of sitting in my high school room at my parents house (love them and this place though). I just feel like I’m not working toward any real goals right now and that is a very empty feeling. I’m not doing the best possible job to satisfy myself and I’m settling. I want to be happy and exploring instead of slipping.

 

I need to stop slipping.

 

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